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Official HR Citation — Repeat Offender
GUILTY

Notice of Formal Infraction
Meeting Creation Delinquency Act, Section 4(c)

Offender: Casey
Classification: REPEAT OFFENDER (3rd strike)
Violation: Failure to Create Meeting
Issuing Authority: HR Department (stuffed, but still valid)
Citation Date: 2026-05-20

Documented Offenses
Total Fine Assessed
$100
Payable immediately. Venmo, cash, or creation of 3 calendar invites (your choice).
Non-payment will result in further documentation and passive-aggressive Slack messages.
HR Representative
Official HR Rep

A Note from HR

I have reviewed Casey's file. I have reviewed it again. The sheer number of unscheduled meetings is, frankly, impressive in a way that brings me no joy. As HR, I am legally required to remain neutral. I am not neutral. Pay the fine, Casey.

HR Representative
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This citation is legally binding in all meeting rooms, Slack channels, and parallel universes where Casey still hasn't sent that invite.